I thought about going about this in a sarcastic and brutal way, but then I remembered how being in retail has taught me to be polite even in the worst of circumstances. So, in keeping with the theme of this blog, I’m going to clue some of you in on the Do’s and Dont’s of shopping in a retail…
12) “Do you have a trash?” you ask, waving half a frapp at me. “There’s one right outside by the benches,” I tell you, because like fuck I’m letting that mess melt all day in the can in my cashwrap.
14) I won’t turn the music off. I’ll let you shop till you’re done spending money in my store. So when you ask when we close and I say “oh, whenever people are done shopping,” please understand that I mean I will literally close the doors the second you leave. I won’t kick you out for just looking around, and I won’t even be mad, because if I’m nice to you tonight, you might remember that and come back to buy something tomorrow.
But don’t act surprised and offended when I close the doors behind you as you leave as though I haven’t just done something for you most stores’ managers would never dream of doing.
So much of my life is out of control right now, in ways that I’m emotionally incapable of handling. Everything feels dishonest and things that should be steps forward suddenly & unexpectedly feel like mini bandaids over giant burn wounds. And honestly my instinct is to do something that doesn’t look self-destructive from the outside, but so plainly is to the point that it would maybe momentarily soothe the burns, but it would ruin all the bandaids, and this metaphor is getting convoluted.
I need to wake up early to do some design work that I’ve been putting off all week. Then I have to go to work 230 to 11 because Halloween. And for the first time in forever, I don’t even want to go to work.
I went to Neil Gaiman’s reading. I met one of my favorite authors as he signed a first edition of his new book, and I shamelessly name-dropped someone we both know.
And he asked for a hug.
One of the people I most admire and respect in this world hugged me today.
I said “Thank you. For every book, for every word,” as he then signed my copy of Good Omens.
And I walked home grinning like an idiot, resisting the urge to read Ocean as I walked because getting hit by a car would have been a foolish way to end the day.